總是有些時候莫名其妙的不開心，心情不佳的時候就會辦什麼都不在狀態，你會這樣麼?這裡小編收集整理了搞笑幽默英語笑話故事，讓你的心情速速好起來。
篇一：搞笑幽默英語笑話故事
An old couple 一對老夫婦
An old couple were very saving. As a result they had a beautifully furnished house. One day the old woman missed her husband. She called out: "Old man, where are you?"
"I'm in the parlor for a nap," replied the old man. the old woman was horrified to hear that. She cried: "What? On the sofa?" "No, I'm lying on the floor," replied the old man.
"Not on that grand carpet?" the old woman asked again anxiously. "No, I've rolled it up," said her husband.
有一對老夫婦非常節省，於是有了一棟裝置很華麗的房子。有一天，老太婆沒有看到她的丈夫，就大聲喊他：“老頭，你在哪裡呀?”
老頭回答說：“我在客廳裡小睡一會兒。”老太婆震驚得大叫起來，說：“什麼?是在沙發上睡嗎?”
“不是，我是躺在地板上的，”老頭回答說。老太婆又著急地問道：“不是躺在華麗的地毯上吧?”“不是的，我已經把它捲起來啦!”老頭說。
篇二：搞笑幽默英語笑話故事
He walks everywhere he goes 耶穌從不開車
A young man came home and said, "Dad, I just got my driver's license and would like to use the family car."
Father replied, "Ok, son, But, first, you have to get good grades in school, keep your room clean, make the yard neat, and cut your hair. Come back in a few months and then we'll see."
Well, several months passed and the young man came into the house with his report card in his hand, "Dad, I got great marks on my report card, I've been keeping my room as neat as apin, and the yard is always ship-shape. How about letting me use the car?"
Father replied, "That's all true, but son, you didn't cut your hair."
Son said, "But, dad, Jesus had long hair too."
Father replied, "Yes, son, you're perfectly right, And he walks everywhere he goes."
一個小夥子回到家跟爸爸說：“爸爸，我拿駕照了，我想開車。”
爸爸答道：“好的，兒子。但是，你要拿到好成績，要把房間給收拾整齊，要把院子打掃乾淨，還要把頭髮給理了。這幾個月做好了我們再談開車的事。”
幾個月後，小夥子拿到成績單回到家，“爸爸，我每門功課都得了優，房間整整齊齊，院子乾乾淨淨。我能開車了嗎?”
爸爸回答：“確實做得很好，但是兒子，你還沒有理髮呢。”
兒子說：“但是，爸爸，耶穌的頭髮也很長啊。”
爸爸回答：“是的'，兒子，完全正確。但是耶穌去哪都是走著去的呀!”
篇三：搞笑幽默英語笑話故事
It was made worse 弄巧成拙
A man went to London to visit a friend. He stayed far longer than was expected. A week passed, he still made no attempt to leave.
At last his friend gave him a gentle hint: "Don't you think that your wife and children would miss you?" But beyond expectation the man's answer was: "Oh, thank you very much. It's most kind of you. I'll send for them."
有個人到倫敦去看望一個朋友。他逗留了很久，是他的朋友沒有料到的。過了一個星期，他還沒打算離去。
最後他的朋友很客氣地暗示他說：“你不覺得你的妻子和孩子在家裡會想念你嗎?”不料這個人的回答是：“啊，非常感謝你。你真是太好心了，我就把他們叫來吧。”