你試過跟朋友聚餐的時候講講英語笑話嗎?下面由本站小編為您整理的一些英語笑話。
I don't think I know
Teacher: "John, what is the past participle of the verb to ring?"
John: "What do you think it is, sir?"
Teacher: "I don't think, I KNOW!"
John: "I don't think I know either, sir!"
老師：“John，動詞ring的過去分詞是什麼?”。
約翰：“你想它是什麼呢”?
老師：“我不用想，我知道!”。
約翰：“我想我不知道”。
A Girl's Name 女孩的`名字
When our daughter was born, we named her Myles, after my beloved late(已故的) father, despite family warning that the name was too masculine(男性的) .
Years later, when I felt she was old enough to understand, I explained to Myles, Your name is very special. I named you after my own father because I loved him very much. I know he would be proud of you.
Myles thought carefully about this and then said, I know all that, Mom. But I don't understand why my grandfather had a girl's name.
女兒出生時，我們給她取名叫邁爾斯，和我深愛的業已過世的父親同一個名字，不過家人提醒這個名字太男性化了。
幾年以後，我覺得邁爾斯已經長大，能夠懂事了。我對她解釋說：你的名字很特別。我給你取了一個和我爸爸一樣的名字，因為我非常愛他。我相信他會為你而深感自豪的。
邁爾斯很仔細地想了一下，然後說道：這些我都懂，媽媽。可是我不知道外公為什麼會有一個女孩子的名字。
電腦問題
I had been doing Tech Support for Hewlett-Packard's DeskJet division for about a month when I had a customer call with a problem I just couldn't solve. She could not print yellow. All the other colors would print fine, which truly baffled me because the only true colors are cyan, magenta, and yellow. I had the customer change ink cartridges，delete and reinstall the drivers. Nothing worked. I asked my coworkers for help; they offered no new ideas. After over two hours of troubleshooting, I was about to tell the customer to send the printer in to us for repair when she asked quietly, "Should I try printing on a piece of white paper instead of yellow paper?"
我在惠普公司印表機部做技術支援工作已經有一個月了，有一天我接到一位客戶的電話，她的問題我沒辦法解決。她的問題是：印表機不能打出來黃色，但是其它顏色都正常。這讓我覺得很納悶，因為三原色就是藍、紅、黃。我建議客戶更換墨盒、刪了驅動程式然後重新安裝，但是都沒有效果。我諮詢同事們，他們也不知道該怎麼辦。經過兩個多小時的交涉，我打算讓客戶把印表機寄給我們，這時候她平靜地說了一句：“我是不是應該把這張黃紙扔了換一張白紙再列印試試。”
精神病醫生
Jerry went to a psychiatrist. "Doc," he said, "I've got trouble. Every time I get into bed, I think there's somebody under it. I'm going crazy!" "Just put yourself in my hands for one year," said the shrink. "Come to me three times a week, and I'll cure your fears." "How much do you charge?" "A hundred dollars per visit." "I'll sleep on it," said Jerry. Six months later the doctor met Jerry on the street. "Why didn't you ever come to see me again?" asked the psychiatrist. "For a hundred bucks a visit? The bartender cured me for $10." "Is that so! How?" "He told me to cut the legs off the bed! Ain't nobody under there now!"
傑瑞去看精神病醫生。“醫生，我有些不對勁。每次睡覺的時候，我都感覺有人在床下。我要瘋了!”“給我一年時間，”醫生說，“每週來三次，我會治好你。”“費用是多少呢?”“每次一百美元。”“我會認真考慮的。”傑瑞答道。六個月後醫生和傑瑞在街上相遇了，“為什麼你再也沒來呢?”醫生問。“一次一百塊錢嗎?有個酒吧服務生收了十塊錢就把我治好了。”“真的?他怎麼做到的?”“他讓我把床腿鋸掉。現在那沒人了!”