你是否經歷過在採訪過程中或是交談過程中，你想要跟他說話的那個人卻起身離開呢？或是做在椅子上搖搖晃晃？或是左顧右盼？你是什麼感覺？大部分人感覺很受傷害。聽眾的行為表現出他或她對說話者所談的內容一點興趣都沒有。然而，當輪到他們發言的時候，他們卻希望大家能夠集中精力。 你是否經歷過在一次激烈的交談中你意識到你的搭檔對你的談話沒有任何意識？可能是因為你表達觀點或是發表演講的方式不對或是對方本來就不想聽。大多數應屆畢業生似乎更不善傾聽。 因此，該如何學習傾聽呢？接下來是一些提示，對任何情況下的傾聽者都有幫助。 1.學著用眼神進行交流：讓說話者知道你對他說的非常感興趣； 2.不要急著說話：有時候，人們想大聲發表高見；有時候，他們所需要的只是一個可以依靠的肩膀和一對善於傾聽的`耳朵。不要急著說話，讓別人把話說完或是將事情解決好； 3.堅守祕密： 人們信任你和你的資訊是因為他們相信你不是一個愛講閒話到處散播流言蜚語的人。保留這份信任，讓祕密堅守在你們兩人之間； 4.要專心 學著積極傾聽，讓對方知道即使你沒有說一句話也表明你確實是在聽，你也不時發出一些“是的，恩，我知道，這是真的，好的，很有意思”之類的聲音。這些都顯示出你和他們在同一個調上而且在跟隨他們的談話； 5.表示感激 讓對方感到敞開心懷同你說話是萬分榮幸的。假如沒有什麼私話可說的話，要讓對方知道你是花時間在聽並從中獲益匪淺。在一個忘記表達感激的社會，一句簡單的善意的話語就會讓別人感到很高興。表現出善意和欣賞也會對你的採訪大有幫助。； 6.同一個語調 不要因為自己心不在焉而不曉得自己到底說到哪了。無論你確實要起身離開或是開小差，無論 已經起身離開或已經在開小差，都是不文明的表現。假如你發現你集中注意力的時間很短，不妨主動重複對方剛剛說的話以保持注意力。 Learn how to be a good listener. Have you ever been in a middle of an interview or even in a conversation when the person you are talking to just gets up and walks away? Or fiddles in the chair? Or looks everywhere but at you? How does this make you feel? Most people feel hurt. The listener acts as though he or she has absolutely no interest in what the speaker has to say. And yet, when it is their turn to talk, they expect, if not demand, attention. Have you ever been in a heated conversation and realize that your partner has no idea what you have been saying? It could very well be the manner that you are delivering the speech, or it may be that your partner is a poor listener. Poor listening skills seem to be the majority and not the minority. Our country is so used to fast paced this and that, that we often forget how to slow down and just listen. So how can we learn to be good listeners? How are some common ideas that seem to work wonders in any relationship: 1. Learn to listen using eye contact: Let the speaker know that you are interested in what is being said. 2. Be slow to speak: Sometimes, people speak to think out loud. Sometimes, all they really want is a shoulder to lean on and a willing ear to listen. By being slow to speak, you are allowing the speaker to work out or solve problems themselves. 3. Keep the secret: People trust you with information because they believe that you will not gossip and spread slander. Keep their trust by keeping things private; between the two of you. 4. Be Attentive: Learn to actively listen. Let the speaker know that you are actually listening, although you are not speaking, by saying things like, "yeah, hmmm, I know, thats true, okay, that makes sense," and so forth. 5. Show Gratitude: Let the speaker know that you feel honored that they were able to open up to you. If nothing personal was said, than let the speaker know that you had a great time listening and that you learned a lot. In a society that forgets to show gratitude, a simple use of kind words, can make someones day a little brighter. 6. Stay in Tune: Dont disappear in the middle of the conversation because your mind wandered. Whether you actually get up and walk away or let your mind wander elsewhere, its just plain rude. If you find that your attention span is small, actively repeat what is being said to you as the speaker is speaking.
