搞笑英語小笑話一：
fat man and a skinny man were arguing about who was the more polite.
The skinny man said he was more polite because he always tipped his hat to ladies. But the fat man knew he was the more courteous because, whenever he got up and offered his seat, two ladies could sit down.
一個胖男人和一個瘦男人正在為誰更有禮貌而爭吵。
瘦男人說他更禮貌，因為他總是向一個女士脫帽致意。但是胖男人說他更禮貌，因為無論何時他起身給女士讓座總是能讓兩位女士同時坐下。
搞笑英語小笑話二：
When a group of women got on the car, every seat was already occupied. The conductor noticed a man who seemed to be asleep, and fearing he might miss his stop, he nudged him and said: "Wake up, sir!"
"I wasn't asleep," the man answered.
"Not asleep? But you had your eyes closed."
"I know. I just hate to look at ladies standing up beside me in a crowded car."
當一群婦女上車之後，車上的座位全都被佔滿了。售票員注意到一名男子好象是睡著了，他擔心這個人會坐過站，就用肘輕輕地碰了碰他，說：“先生，醒醒!”
“我沒有睡著。”那個男人回答。
“沒睡著?可是你眼睛都閉上了呀?”
“我知道，我只是不願意看到在擁擠的車上有女士站在我身邊而已。”
搞笑英語小笑話三：
A Jealous Wife
There was once a wife so jealous that when her husband came home one night
and she couldn’t find hairs on his jackets she yelled at him," Great, so now you’
re cheating on me with a bald woman!"
The next night, when she didn’t smell any perfume, she yelled again by
saying, "She’s not only bald, but she’s too cheap to buy any perfume!"
從前有個妻子醋勁很大。一天晚上丈夫回家，她沒有從他衣服上找到頭髮，於是大叫：“好啊，現在你開始和禿頭的女人騙我了!”
第二天晚上，她沒有從丈夫衣服上聞到香水味，於是又大叫：“她不但是個禿頭，而且很窮酸，連香水都不買。”