生活中多點歡笑總是好的，今天我們就一起來欣賞欣賞簡單搞笑英語笑話吧!
簡單搞笑英語笑話(一)
你丈夫需要安靜地休息
Doctor:Your husband needs rest and are some sleeping pills.
醫生：你丈夫需要安靜地休息。這是安眠藥。
Wife:When must I give them to him?
老婆：我什麼時候給他吃?
Doctor:They are for you.
醫生：這是給你的。
簡單搞笑英語笑話(二)
三隻烏龜
Three turtles decided to have a cup of coffee.
三隻烏龜決定去喝咖啡。
Just as they got into the cafe, it started to rain.
它們剛到咖啡店的'門口，就下起雨來。
The biggest turtle said to the smallest one, " Go home and get the umbrella."
於是最大的那隻烏龜對最小的烏龜說，“你回家去取傘吧。”
The little turtle replied, "I will, if you don't drink my offee."
最小的烏龜說，“如果你們不把我的咖啡喝了，我就去。”
"We won't," the other two promised.
“我們不喝，”另外兩隻烏龜答應說。
Two years later the big turtle said to the middle turtle, "Well, I guess he isn't coming back, so we might as well drink his coffee."
兩年後，大烏龜對中烏龜說，“好吧，我猜他肯定不回來了，我們可以把它的咖啡喝掉了。”
Just then a voice called from outside the door, "If you do, I won't go."
正在這時，一個聲音從門外傳來，“你們要是喝了，我就不去。”
簡單搞笑英語笑話(三)
兒子的零花錢
After sending our son away to college, he would often call up asking for money.
自從送了我兒子去上大學之後，他就經常打電話問我們要錢。
One time when he called my husband answered, "sure we will send you money"he said," and I also noticed that you left your Physics book here, should we send that also?"
有一回他打電話過來，是我的老公接的，我老公回道：“我們會給你匯錢過去的，另外我看見你把你的物理書掉在家裡了，我們要把那書也寄過去麼?”
"Uh, oh yeah, OK," he responded. I asked him afterward how much he sent up "$1,100" he said. When I gave him a surprised look, he explained, "Don't worry, I taped a $100 check on the cover, and the other $1000 check inside the cover!
“呃，好的”兒子回答道。後來我問我老公他給兒子寄了多少錢。“1100美元”他說。當看見我驚訝的表情後他解釋道：“不用擔心，我把100美元的支票粘在了書的封面，另外1000美元的支票粘在了封面裡面!”