Good news and bad news
There is the story of a pastor1 who got up one Sunday and announced to his congregation: "I have good news and bad news. The good news is, we have enough money to pay for our new building program. The bad news is, it's still out there in your pockets."
Energy efficient vehicle
While driving in Pennsylvania, a family caught up to an Amish carriage. The owner of the carriage obviously had a sense of humor, because attached to the back of the carriage was a hand printed sign:
"Energy efficient vehicle: Runs on oats and grass. Caution: Do not step in exhaust."
What the Bible means
A father was approached by his small son who told him proudly, "I know what the Bible1means!" His father smiled and replied, "What do you mean, you 'know' what the Bible means?"
The son replied, "I do know!" "Okay," said his father. "What does the Bible mean?" "That's easy, Daddy..." the young boy replied excitedly, "It stands for 'Basic Information Before Leaving Earth.'